The first installment of The Youth is Write Series includes Greg Dybec interviewing the always elegant and in your face, Ana C. Take a look as they explore youth and writing through sex, style, poetry, and profanity.
Ana C. is the author of two books of poetry: Make-Believe Love-Making and This is Controversial. She is the founder and editor of New Wave Vomit, an experimental online literary art magazine. Her work has appeared in Pop Serial 2, Thieves Jargon, For Every Year, and Pangur Ban Party, and she has work forthcoming in Thunderclap and Magic Helicopter Press. “C. stands for Carrete.” She currently lives in Tijuana, Mexico. Her blog: http://idonothavepenisenvy.blogspot.com/
Greg Dybec: There is only one way to kick this off. Please write a 3-4 line poem that sums up what it means to be a young writer, but you have to use what I assume to be your favorite word, Penis.
Ana C.:
i can’t breathe without thinking about the internet
i need feedback and approval
i feel like an amateur penis when you leave me
negative comments on my blog
GD: I’m a big fan of your poetry. It’s a treat to see work that’s so raw yet delicate. How intentional is your style, and is that the way you’ve always written? Also, where did such a strong focus on sexuality derive from?
AC: Thank you. I don’t think my style is intentional. I think in short sentences. That might have something to do with the fact that when I “think in English” I feel worried I’ll make mistakes because it’s my second language. I used to write in Spanish (only when I was feeling sad), so this “crossover” has definitely changed my style. I avoided sex for a while. I started school in the U.S. in 2004, so I had to start thinking in English. Professors encouraged me to take Creative Writing courses and one day I finally made up my mind. I started to take writing “seriously” around 2008. To answer your question about sexuality: I went to Catholic schools all my life, so I was raised thinking sex was “bad.” One day during a workshop, a guy said, “You can say it. You can say sex or fuck or whatever. It would be better if you just said it.” My professor agreed. Sex was like a pool and I was walking around it. I was getting my toes wet but that was it. I don’t know how it happened, but all I know is that suddenly I kept typing, “fuck, pussy, penis,” etc., just because I could. I think “Sex isn’t just sex. It’s everything and it makes the world go ‘round.”
Greg Dybec: There is only one way to kick this off. Please write a 3-4 line poem that sums up what it means to be a young writer, but you have to use what I assume to be your favorite word, Penis.
Ana C.:
i can’t breathe without thinking about the internet
i need feedback and approval
i feel like an amateur penis when you leave me
negative comments on my blog
GD: I’m a big fan of your poetry. It’s a treat to see work that’s so raw yet delicate. How intentional is your style, and is that the way you’ve always written? Also, where did such a strong focus on sexuality derive from?
AC: Thank you. I don’t think my style is intentional. I think in short sentences. That might have something to do with the fact that when I “think in English” I feel worried I’ll make mistakes because it’s my second language. I used to write in Spanish (only when I was feeling sad), so this “crossover” has definitely changed my style. I avoided sex for a while. I started school in the U.S. in 2004, so I had to start thinking in English. Professors encouraged me to take Creative Writing courses and one day I finally made up my mind. I started to take writing “seriously” around 2008. To answer your question about sexuality: I went to Catholic schools all my life, so I was raised thinking sex was “bad.” One day during a workshop, a guy said, “You can say it. You can say sex or fuck or whatever. It would be better if you just said it.” My professor agreed. Sex was like a pool and I was walking around it. I was getting my toes wet but that was it. I don’t know how it happened, but all I know is that suddenly I kept typing, “fuck, pussy, penis,” etc., just because I could. I think “Sex isn’t just sex. It’s everything and it makes the world go ‘round.”
GD: What made you want to write, and what still drives you today?
AC: When I was a kid I loved the movie, The Never Ending Story (I’ve never read the novel). The boy is bullied at school, likes to read, and the story becomes his reality. I decided I could (and wanted to) be that kid. Also, I think this is how I “deal with things.” Also, some friends encouraged me. Their approval helped me a lot. I’m very thankful. Blog comments encourage me. Is that silly? I don’t think so. Comments make my day. I love comments.
AC: When I was a kid I loved the movie, The Never Ending Story (I’ve never read the novel). The boy is bullied at school, likes to read, and the story becomes his reality. I decided I could (and wanted to) be that kid. Also, I think this is how I “deal with things.” Also, some friends encouraged me. Their approval helped me a lot. I’m very thankful. Blog comments encourage me. Is that silly? I don’t think so. Comments make my day. I love comments.
GD: Focusing on the aspect of youth, you recently posted a poem of yours on your blog, and the last few lines read:
“during the holidays
some family members
call me "the writer"
some people think
they're so funny
shit
i'm just like whatever
when i walk around”
I keep finding myself going back to that piece and reading it, especially after having the idea for this interview series. Do you think that aimless title of “the writer” is something a lot of young writers are given by family members or friends, where it’s said almost playfully, like it may be a phase or some ailment that won’t last? Maybe what I’m trying to ask is, do you think a lot of young writers are not taken seriously by the people who are not a part of this literary community and are quick to associate success in writing with age?
AC: People who are not part of this literary community don’t take us seriously. At least most people. Of course there are exceptions, but I can say yes from my experience. People always ask, “What are you studying? Literature? So where are you going to work? How are you going to make money?” People laugh, “So what do you write? Poetry? (the reaction is always worse if you write poetry), What do you write about?” and then I just answer something like “Everything” and of course they insist, but I try to change the subject because I don’t need their approval, because they’re not my audience. (Was that rude or something?). Having conversations about writing with people who don’t read and/or aren’t interested is always awkward. I’m awkward too so that doesn’t help. Some weeks ago, I got an email from an unknown 50 something year old man. He said “...one criticism, profanity (even subtly confined) is an adolescent cop-out. You can do better, and will, as you mature. Thanks, however, I laughed and thought - both good activities/sentiments - and appreciate that young people are different now than long ago when I fit that ludicrous designation.”
“during the holidays
some family members
call me "the writer"
some people think
they're so funny
shit
i'm just like whatever
when i walk around”
I keep finding myself going back to that piece and reading it, especially after having the idea for this interview series. Do you think that aimless title of “the writer” is something a lot of young writers are given by family members or friends, where it’s said almost playfully, like it may be a phase or some ailment that won’t last? Maybe what I’m trying to ask is, do you think a lot of young writers are not taken seriously by the people who are not a part of this literary community and are quick to associate success in writing with age?
AC: People who are not part of this literary community don’t take us seriously. At least most people. Of course there are exceptions, but I can say yes from my experience. People always ask, “What are you studying? Literature? So where are you going to work? How are you going to make money?” People laugh, “So what do you write? Poetry? (the reaction is always worse if you write poetry), What do you write about?” and then I just answer something like “Everything” and of course they insist, but I try to change the subject because I don’t need their approval, because they’re not my audience. (Was that rude or something?). Having conversations about writing with people who don’t read and/or aren’t interested is always awkward. I’m awkward too so that doesn’t help. Some weeks ago, I got an email from an unknown 50 something year old man. He said “...one criticism, profanity (even subtly confined) is an adolescent cop-out. You can do better, and will, as you mature. Thanks, however, I laughed and thought - both good activities/sentiments - and appreciate that young people are different now than long ago when I fit that ludicrous designation.”
GD: How did the idea for New Wave Vomit come about?
AC: I had another site before New Wave Vomit. I needed to renovate my website (aka pay for another year of hosting) but I didn’t want it anymore (someone was stalking me). I felt like I needed to change the url, so I decided to delete all my information from the site, so I created a thing called “Poems About Expiring.” It was an open invitation to bloggers: “Hey everyone! My website is going to expire soon. I’ll publish whatever. The poems just need to be about expiring.” I posted 37 poems and they disappeared after 2 months. Everyone said nice things about the project, so I decided to do it again: New Wave Vomit. The name comes from a line from one of my poems. Vomiting is something everyone hates, but it makes you feel better once you’ve done it. “Punk meets Pop.” Haha.
AC: I had another site before New Wave Vomit. I needed to renovate my website (aka pay for another year of hosting) but I didn’t want it anymore (someone was stalking me). I felt like I needed to change the url, so I decided to delete all my information from the site, so I created a thing called “Poems About Expiring.” It was an open invitation to bloggers: “Hey everyone! My website is going to expire soon. I’ll publish whatever. The poems just need to be about expiring.” I posted 37 poems and they disappeared after 2 months. Everyone said nice things about the project, so I decided to do it again: New Wave Vomit. The name comes from a line from one of my poems. Vomiting is something everyone hates, but it makes you feel better once you’ve done it. “Punk meets Pop.” Haha.
GD: I’ll leave this one sort of vague, but do you think there is a certain style associated with young writers? Perhaps, an assumed bohemian lifestyle sort of deal. Of course this widely varies, but do you think that’s become a common assumption?
AC: We’re young and we party and we write about that sometimes. I don’t think there’s anything wrong with that, but sometimes people act like strict parents. “Don’t use profanity, kids!” I don’t know. People stereotype. One of my best friends once said: “Look at me. I’m a writer. I wear a beret. ‘Penis, penis, vagina, vagina.’” He was kidding of course, but there are people who think that way.
GD: What effect does living in Tijuana have on your writing (if any at all)?
AC: Yes. I guess I never realized the contrast between Tijuana and California until I went to college and “grew up.” Not only does living in Tijuana affect it, but also, having to go from one country to the other (sometimes on a daily basis). The contrast is difficult. The city is Americanized, but I have to be extra careful here. I lock my car as soon as I get in. I’m constantly afraid/nervous/stressed. It’s tiring. I write about these feelings all the time. I’m going to write a novel “about” Tijuana.
GD: Where would you most like to see yourself in five years, in terms of your life and writing?
AC: I want to be a Spanish Lit professor, translate, and write until the day I die. We’ll see what happens. Thanks Greg. I enjoyed this interview.
AC: We’re young and we party and we write about that sometimes. I don’t think there’s anything wrong with that, but sometimes people act like strict parents. “Don’t use profanity, kids!” I don’t know. People stereotype. One of my best friends once said: “Look at me. I’m a writer. I wear a beret. ‘Penis, penis, vagina, vagina.’” He was kidding of course, but there are people who think that way.
GD: What effect does living in Tijuana have on your writing (if any at all)?
AC: Yes. I guess I never realized the contrast between Tijuana and California until I went to college and “grew up.” Not only does living in Tijuana affect it, but also, having to go from one country to the other (sometimes on a daily basis). The contrast is difficult. The city is Americanized, but I have to be extra careful here. I lock my car as soon as I get in. I’m constantly afraid/nervous/stressed. It’s tiring. I write about these feelings all the time. I’m going to write a novel “about” Tijuana.
GD: Where would you most like to see yourself in five years, in terms of your life and writing?
AC: I want to be a Spanish Lit professor, translate, and write until the day I die. We’ll see what happens. Thanks Greg. I enjoyed this interview.
Check back January 28th for the second installment of The Youth is Write Series, which will include a video interview between Frank Hinton and Richard Chiem that you won't want to miss.
RSS Feed